Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Avatar: The Last Airbender episodes/archive1

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List of Avatar: The Last Airbender episodes[edit]

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
This article was just demoted from featured list, and since then, the article has changed drastically. In fact, it is practically a whole different article. Any comments welcome. Thanks, — Parent5446 ☯ (message email) 22:51, 1 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Haha169
Ah...good. I was just about to start a peer review session. I was also just scanning the FL criteria, and I also think it meets pretty much everything listed there. I would, however, like to see a couple cites in the lead, especially the end of paragraph 1. Paragraph 2 refs seem to be listed in "General".

Good job. I really liked the coloring syntax improvements. --haha169 (talk) 18:07, 6 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: Very briefly, here are some suggestions for improvement. If you want more comments, please ask here.

  • Needs a copyedit - just the lead sentence is missing a few words The following is an episode list for Nickelodeon's animated television series Avatar: The Last Airbender[, which?] first aired on February 21, 2005 with a one-hour series premiere,[1] and concluded its [run?] with a two-hour series finale on July 19, 2008.[2]
    • Good catch. That should've been obvious. I'll fix it and see if there's more. --haha169 (talk) 20:26, 9 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • Print it out and read it out loud slowly to catch more errors and rough spots Ruhrfisch ><>°° 01:45, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • I'm an environmentalist, and on Rau's talk page, I think I once noted that I never print out stuff unless absolutely necessary. I can read from the screen just fine. On a different note: So you think this is ready for FLC if the plot section is fixed? --haha169 (talk) 05:09, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Make sure that fictional elements are described from an out of universe perspective - see WP:IN-U
    • I'm just going to take over for Parent while he's busy doing homework per his talk page. Anyway, could you possibly give more specific examples? The only fictitious section in this list is a short plot in the lead. --haha169 (talk) 20:25, 9 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • That's the section I meant - imagine you knew nothing of the series (I know a little bit about it, but have never seen a full episode). What is "bending"? What is an "Avatar"? That's the sort of thing that is hard to explain succinctly, but try harder here please Ruhrfisch ><>°° 01:45, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • I tried to explain it short and sweetly, is the way it is okay? Rau's Speak Page 01:57, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
          • Somewhat - my understanding is that many people can manipulate one of the four elements fairly well, but only the Avatar can "bend" all four elements. The current first sentence of the plot paragraph makes it sound like only the Avatar can "bend" Ruhrfisch ><>°° 03:35, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
              • I've partially re-written Rau's addition. How's it sound now? Remember: Avatar isn't exactly a person. He's not mortal. --haha169 (talk) 05:07, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
                • I have written it to include that normal people can do it too. And what do you mean the Avatar isn't mortal? Roku was killed. Aang would have died if not for Katara. Just because Kyoshi was a freak doesn't mean the rest of them are. And being reincarnated doesn't mean that you aren't mortal. It means that you can be killed, and then come back as something else. Rau's Speak Page 13:05, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
                  • Think again. I'm under the impression that Aang is Roku and kyoshi and all those other Avatars. --haha169 (talk) 17:45, 10 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • I would add more references to the lead, especially since there are no refs after the first sentence
    • Some of the stuff in the lead is listed in the "General" section of the References section. I've added a few more refs to those that don't relate to the "General" section. I think I just resolved my above comment as well. :P --haha169 (talk) 20:35, 9 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • I like the colors too, good idea

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 04:00, 9 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

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