Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/The Concert in Central Park/archive3
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- The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
The article was promoted by GrahamColm 12:47, 3 September 2012 [1].
The Concert in Central Park[edit]
The Concert in Central Park (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)
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I am nominating this for featured article because of low interest in the second nom and because it meets the criteria. Regards. Kürbis (✔) 09:28, 10 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
CommentSupport
No alt text on image for album cover.
- I thought this is not required?
- My understanding is that alt text is required, per WP:ALT.
Fn57 is a dead link.
- Yes, that site is always changing. Weeks ago it was not broken, now it is again dead...
And in the naked light I saw ten thousand people maybe more - needs quotation marks and a cite.
- Not sure what you mean. This is inside a quote box
"I need to talk to you!" - needs a citation.
- It does not, as it is can be heared in the album or video
- It appears, from the text later in the paragraph that this part was omitted from the album due to the outburst. Could you clarify it it was or was not on the album?
- The paragraph tells that "it did not appear on the live album because of the interruption."
In Critical Reception, 1981 is bracketed - why?
- Square brackets are used in quotes to emphasize that the editor changed the wording for logic's sake. For example, the quoting person may have said "this year", but the reader can not understand what year if there is no context available. So, square brackets are required and the content inside can be changed
"vividly recaptured another time, an era when well-crafted, melodic pop bore meanings that stretched beyond the musical sphere and into the realms of culture and politics" - needs a citation.
- I don't understand you. This is from <ref name="Rolling Stone 1981-10-29" />
- It was a little confusing, as that cite was after the next sentence.
"Let's have our own fireworks!" - needs a citation.
- It does not as this appears in the CD and video
- I don't see anything else at this time. GregJackP Boomer! 00:50, 15 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Support - the article was already very comprehensive and an enjoyable read, and has been improved with the latest fixes and copy edits. Some more comments:
- The quote-template uses "sign" instead of "author" (see template:QUOTE for more detail). I would fix them myself, but maybe you want to use a different quote format altogether.
- The citations for those quote templates are not displayed at the moment (the nesting within the template is a problem). Putting them immediately after the quote text works.
- regarding the "vividly ..."-quote: most articles, i've seen, use an additional immediate citation after the quote. GermanJoe (talk) 14:05, 17 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
A few more comments.
- Minor stylistic point: you might consider removing the commas that occur before "and" if the sentence is not long, there are other commas in the vicinity (makes it smoother on the balance sheet), and no other "ands" are hanging around in the sentence. This one seems reasonable: "Davis authorized the project, and Delsener entered discussions with cable TV channel HBO to decide who would perform.", since the rhythm plays out nicely and they're two rather distinct meanings; this one's good two, describing two actions over time: "The man was carried away by security, and Simon finished the song." But the last comma in this next example might be better removed ... it also avoids the feeling of parallelism between the two sentences (I've bolded both, but just the last one is at issue, I think): "At the start of the 1980s, the city lacked the financial resources to spend an estimated US$3,000,000 to restore[1] or even to maintain the park, and serious consideration was given to closing it.[3] The nonprofit Central Park Conservancy was founded in 1980, and began a successful campaign to raise renovation funds.[4]". successful"
- "rundown"—should it be two words? "run-down green space"? Not sure. "indicated" ... consider "showed" as just slightly more appropriate.
- Done
- "From the promoter's viewpoint, Simon and Garfunkel were ideal choices. Not only likely to draw a large crowd to the concert, they also had roots in the city:[5] both had grown up and gone to school in Forest Hills, Queens." I read the first clause and wondered whether it was a glitch. Strictly speaking, it's grammatical when taken as a whole, but is there a reason to use a marked theme in such an elaborate clause complex? You might consider something like: "From the promoter's viewpoint, Simon and Garfunkel were ideal choices. Not only were they likely to draw a large crowd to the concert—they also had roots in the city:[5] both had grown up and gone to school in Forest Hills, Queens." (I hope I guessed the right dash you're using ... come to think of it, you haven't used a single dash.)
- Done
- "Lyrics which referred to the New York area produced audience applause, such as Garfunkel's ode to his home city, "A Heart in New York", which describes from a New Yorker's point of view the first glimpse of the city when returning there by air:[27]" ... another parallel that could be avoided by starting "Lyrics referring to ...". Tony (talk) 01:06, 19 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Comment This article, especially the prose, has improved remarkably since I opposed its June FAC.
- According to compact disc, the CD was invented a few months after the original release of the live album. Hence, the album cover is not the original and probably needs to be changed.
- ' "The Sound of Silence", "Mrs. Robinson", and "The Boxer" ': why are these particular songs mentioned by name in the lead? Is it because they are popular? Then mention that.
- Done
- "was certified 2x-platinum": expand this to mention and/or link to RIAA and the definition of platinum.
- Was the original album a double LP? This needs to be mentioned in the lead.
- The album is generally a double album
- The set list and tracklist are a duplication of information. I suggest you remove the former, and incorporate the original performers into a column in the latter. Also, per WP:ALBUM, move the tracklist to its own section after Aftermath. To save space, you could do away with tracklisting template and just manually list side-by-side (like the set-list).
- It was changed by a user. Perhaps it is better to split the album tracklisting and the set list, as there were cases of confusion.
- "it did not appear on the live album because of the interruption.": source?
- Removed
- Couldn't the video's certifications just be a sub-section of the other one (renamed Chart performance and certification)?
- Done
- Citations need to be closely scrutinised for consistent formatting. I see missing retrieval dates, italicised websites, unitalicised newspapers etc.
- Only big concern: is the Mario Gras book a reliable source? It is published by Books on Demand (BoD), which appears to be a self-publishing service. According to WP:SPS, "self-published media, such as books ... are largely not acceptable as sources."—indopug (talk) 08:20, 20 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
- Support on comprehensiveness and prose. No clangers stand out that need fixing and flows nicely. A good read. Casliber (talk · contribs) 13:53, 28 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.