Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Siege of Lal Masjid/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by User:SandyGeorgia 03:25, 13 January 2009 [1].

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Siege of Lal Masjid

Nominator(s): Mercenary2k (talk)

I'm nominating this article for featured article because its well researched and fairly stable and well cited and netural and deserves to be FA. Mercenary2k (talk) 04:13, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

Oppose -- Prose and Mos issues. Needs a through copyedit. =Nichalp «Talk»= 13:10, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

Comment With the exception of the map the images currently used in the article have serious issues. Two will probably get deleted soon, and File:Pic17.jpg needs to have an actual non-free use rationale written ASAP (as opposed to the current "rationale" that is just a plea not to delete it "at the time beeing") to avoid the same fate. --Sherool (talk) 22:52, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

Oppose -- based solely on the opening paragraph, and particularly the first sentence. Imagine I know nothing about it, nothing. Now, open the article with the one sentence that will set me into what this article is about. The rest of the paragraph doesn't do that either. A confrontation when? Between whom? Well, it's in Pakistan, so we've narrowed it down to some 50+ years, but .... The rest of the paragraph doesn't help. Two guys who ran a mosque were continuing to do some fighting about something unmentioned against the government, somehow a school was also in the center of the siege, did they run the school, too? the brothers committed crimes, and somehow all these confusing things led to a siege by unknown, unmentioned forces, against this mosque and school... Or maybe something else happened. It would be really useful if you wrote an opening sentence and paragraph as if this was the only thing anybody read, they would come away knowing who did what to whom when, where, and why. Then flesh out the necessary details in the rest of the lead to set the entire article. That's my opinion. --KP Botany (talk) 07:11, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

• Comment Ref 43 and 54 appears to have dead links. - Mailer Diablo 18:11, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

• Dabs; please check the disambiguation links identified in the toolbox. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 21:19, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.