Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Russian battleship Pobeda/archive1

Add links
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by GrahamColm via Hawkeye7 (talk) 21:02, 29 September 2014 (UTC) [1].[reply]

Russian battleship Pobeda[edit]

Nominator(s): Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:34, 21 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Pobeda was one of five Russian pre-dreadnought battleships captured during the Russo-Japanese War of 1904–05. She participated in all of the major naval battles of the war and was eventually sunk by Japanese artillery during the Siege of Port Arthur. After the war, she was refloated by the Japanese and incorporated into their navy after three years of repair. She was not very active in Japanese service, serving mostly in training roles, but her most significant service was during the Battle of Tsingtao during World War I when the Japanese besieged the German-held Chinese port. She was disarmed during the early 1920s in accordance with the Washington Naval Treaty and may have been broken up around the same time, although some sources suggest that she was not scrapped until the end of World War II. The article passed a MilHist A-class review last month and should be in pretty good shape. I trust, however, that reviewers will point out any infelicities of language or unexplained jargon.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:34, 21 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

  • File:Naval_Ensign_of_Russia.svg: source link is dead
    • If this were anything more simple geometric shapes, I'd be concerned about this, but since that's all it is, I don't believe that this is a problem.
  • File:Pobeda1904Port-Artur.jpg: if author is unknown, how can we be sure date of death is more than 70 years ago? Nikkimaria (talk) 15:46, 24 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
    • You're right, we can't. I've deleted the PD-70 tag and added a US Navy one as we can't be sure who actually took the photo and rule out a naval attache. The photo ended up in Navy hands, either by purchase or by its own people, so I can only assume that copyright ended up with them as well.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Support on prose per standard disclaimer. I've looked at the changes made since I reviewed this for A-class. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 01:48, 26 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support I don't have much, and it's not worth holding the ship for ...
Lede
  • "The ship was transferred" Wouldn't "assigned" be better, given that it didn't have a previous posting?
  • Good catch.
  • Construction
"at a cost of 10,050,000 rubles" this feels awkwardly tacked on the sentence. I know it refers to how much the ship cost, but grammatically, it doesn't seem to meet up with anything.
  • It's thematically linked, I believe, to the official acceptance of the ship. But if that doesn't work, do you think that I should split it off into its own sentence?
  • Yellow Sea
"Around 18:00, her topmasts were destroyed ... " This sentence is a bit confusing because I gather it's combining damage from Probeda and damage from what happened to another ship. I think they should be separated.--Wehwalt (talk) 16:47, 27 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • I think, rather, that I'll delete the bit about the topmasts entirely as it's not particularly important to this ship since she wasn't a flagship that needed to signal her subordinate ships. Thanks for reviewing this so promptly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Comment, leaning Support -- Recusing from coord duties, I copyedited/reviewed/supported at MilHist ACR and, having checked changes made since then I'm pretty close to supporting for FA. Just one thing, I can see you've changed the emphasis of when she was likely scrapped, which is fine, but I'm not sure about the wording of it. Finishing with "some sources disagree" leaves one hanging and, besides, there's only one source cited, so is it really some or just one? Based on what I see here, I'd prefer the end to be worded "She was probably scrapped in 1922–23, but at least one source suggests she was refloated and hulked, serving until being broken up at Kure in 1946", citing both McLaughlin and Jentschura et al, and then your footnote could just be along the lines of "She is not listed in Fukui Shinzo's authoritative Japanese Naval Vessels at the End of World War II". Happy to discuss, of course. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:19, 28 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

That works well, I think, with one modest tweak to your wording of the note. Thanks for looking this over.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
No prob, happy to support. FTR, as well as prose, structure, detail and images, I looked over the sources at ACR and the one minor issue I saw was rectified. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 15:57, 28 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support - I reviewed this at the A-class review and my concerns were addressed there. Parsecboy (talk) 16:50, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_article_candidates/Russian_battleship_Pobeda/archive1&oldid=627595548"