Talk:Typhoon Halola/GA1
GA Review[edit]
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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 16:06, 5 March 2020 (UTC)
- that traversed the Pacific Ocean along a 7,640 km (4,750 mi) long path. --> "that traversed 7,640 km... of the Pacific Ocean". I felt like this wording could've been improved, so as to avoid "along" and "long" in the same sentence.
- " On July 6, a low-level circulation that had developed a few days prior began increasing in organization. " - this threw me off by saying that the circulation developed a few days prior. You said in the previous sentence that the trough moved into the CPAC on 7/5. Do you have a definitive start to the storm?
- Parts of the MH are heavy on jargon. This part felt a bit wonky - "A weakening trend soon followed as wind shear increased once again and a tropical upper tropospheric trough that had been aiding outflow began to dissipate."
- in the third MH paragraph, you say "Vertical wind shear", as opposed to regular wind shear, or easterly wind shear. I think you could get away with each time just saying "wind shear"
- Could you mention Halola's path through the Ryukyus in the MH? You talk a lot about its fluctuations in intensity, and then suddenly the landfall in Japan.
The article is in really good shape, so there wasn't a whole lot to point out. Let me know if you have any questions about my comments, but I think it should be easy to address. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 16:06, 5 March 2020 (UTC)