Talk:Tornado myths/GA1

GA Review

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I'll be reviewing this article. Sasata (talk) 15:57, 24 February 2009 (UTC)

The article needs quite a bit of work, especially with respect to the lead, and citations. Am failing the article for now, but feel free to resubmit once these issues have been addressed. Sasata (talk) 17:04, 24 February 2009 (UTC)

• The lead section is much too short, and doesn't properly introduce or give context to the rest of the article.
• What's the rationale for linking the date April 10, 1979?
• Make sure there's no space between punctuation marks and citation #'s.
• Would like to see at brief explanation of what the F-ratings mean, or at least a proper wikilink to such info. I clicked on the link F4 tornado in the first section to find this information, but it took me to a specific F4 tornado.

Ok now I found a link later in the text, suggest move it closer to the beginning.

• There's several peacock words, or or words/phrases to avoid. Examples:

"The first notable instance of a person using a highway overpass for shelter..."

• "... it is not surprising that tornadoes would strike outside of the downtown area more often."
• Citations need to be much tighter. For example, many sweeping generalizations are made that need to be more specifically cited rather than a general citation at the end of the paragraph, otherwise it sounds too much like original research. Also, sentences giving specific facts (like numbers) also need citing. For example:

"...and for many scientific reasons, meteorologists insist that overpasses are insufficient shelter from tornado winds and debris, and may possibly be the worst place to be during a violent tornado."

"While it was a revolutionary book containing many breakthrough ideas..."

"In even the most violent tornadoes, there is only a pressure drop of about 10%, which is about 1.4 pounds per square inch (9.7 kPa). Not only can this difference be equalized in most structures in approximately three seconds, but is a pressure insufficient to cause any sort of damage."

"This is false, and a potentially deadly myth which can lead to a false sense of security, especially for unaware spotters or chasers."

"Most of these beliefs stem from the idea that tornadoes cannot cross or form near these terrain features."

"Many people believe that, for various reasons, large cities can not be struck by tornadoes."

"More than 100 tornadoes have struck downtown areas of large cities in recorded history."

• "Dr. Fujita observed that the main funnel of a multiple-vortex tornadic system moves along a straight path, and the damage radius will miss those structures which are close but not directly inside of the circulation." Not clear what is meant by "the circulation" here. Is this just the main tunnel or the aggregate of the main funnel and the smaller ones?
• Under the topic headings "Tornado behavior" and "Geographical influences", rather than a one-liner sentence that tells me what I'm going to be reading in the section (e.g. "This section will focus on myths regarding the behavior of tornadoes, including their damage paths and shapes."), I'd expect to see a more well-developed blurb to introduce the info that follows.
• "Tornadoes can occur in Mexico, Australia, England, Russia, Brazil, Bangladesh, and many other areas apart from the United States and Canada." Not clear, is it a myth that they occur here? This sentence follows "This section explores myths concerning the effect of certain terrain on tornado behavior", so that's the confused impression I'm getting.
• Tornadoes often occur in the outer rainbands of tropical cyclones, which affect every continent except Antarctica." Source?
• "...or mobile homes, attracts tornadoes"
• Sections consisting of single sentences look awkward and are best avoided (re:Tornadoes in the winter). Either integrate elsewhere or expand.
• Would highly recommend putting web sources into citation templates, or at the very least, giving information about the website name or publisher with the citation. This helps the reader quickly assess the reliability of the info without having to click through to the website. (thinking specifically of citations 10, 12, 13, 15, 18 (needs title).
• Citations 22 and 29 need more info (year; year + pg. #).

Good lord...I've been watching this page for a long time and I just want you to know that your review and suggestions are phenomenal, Sasata...seriously a spectacular job. Now - I really want to tag this article for tone/unverified claims/weasel words...I'm just not sure of the best tag template to use. Also, how long does the article have to wait for improvement before we can just merge with the main article already??ocrasaroon (talk) 07:04, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

How about you fix the problems instead of complaining about them ;-D. Regardless, I'm on the case. -RunningOnBrains 18:50, 27 March 2009 (UTC)

I have struck the fixed comments...feel free to revert if it seems too disruptive. -RunningOnBrains^{(talk page)} 06:55, 11 June 2009 (UTC)