Talk:Lucy Burwell Page Saunders

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A fact from Lucy Burwell Page Saunders appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 16 January 2021 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:

Did you know... that Lucy Burwell Page Saunders's novel Dora Lee features a French-speaking macaw named Fanchon, inspired by Dolley Madison's pet parrot, who attacks three different characters in eight pages?

A record of the entry may be seen at Wikipedia:Recent additions/2021/January. The nomination discussion and review may be seen at Template:Did you know nominations/Lucy Burwell Page Saunders.

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Did you know nomination[edit]

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 17:18, 11 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

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~~... that Lucy Burwell Page Saunders' novel Dora Lee features a French-speaking macaw named Fanchon who attacks three different characters in eight pages?~~ Source: "Saunders undoubtedly used Polly as the model for Fanchon, a French-speaking macaw who attacks three characters within the span of eight pages."[1])

Created by Gamaliel (talk). Self-nominated at 16:49, 30 December 2020 (UTC).[reply]

Reviewed Jackie Saccoccio. Gamaliel (talk) 17:15, 30 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

General: Article is new enough and long enough
New enough: Long enough:

Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems
Adequate sourcing: Neutral: Free of copyright violations, plagiarism, and close paraphrasing:

Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation
Cited: Interesting:

QPQ: Done.

Overall: Article about 2800 characters; hook about 150 characters. Article was created fewer than seven days prior to the nomination. Hook has been verified and is of general interest. QPQ has been checked. Good work! Extraordinary Writ (talk) 04:36, 2 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, this hook does not satisfy WP:DYKSG#C6. Maybe add more of the real-life background. Yoninah (talk) 23:51, 7 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

How about this? Gamaliel (talk) 00:22, 8 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

ALT1: ... that Lucy Burwell Page Saunders' novel Dora Lee features a French-speaking macaw named Fanchon, based on the parrot owned by James and Dolley Madison, who attacks three different characters in eight pages? Source: "Saunders undoubtedly used Polly as the model for Fanchon, a French-speaking macaw who attacks three characters within the span of eight pages."[2]) Gamaliel (talk) 00:22, 8 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I apologize for missing that. The alternate is a bit long - I count 205 characters - and I'm not sure it reads smoothly enough. You might remove "James Madison" (it appears to have been Dolley's parrot) and/or "French-speaking". I am also advised that the names of novels are supposed to be avoided if there is no article already written about them. Alternatively, it might be easier to write a hook about her being the youngest of twenty children. Extraordinary Writ (talk) 00:57, 8 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Or this? ALT2: ... that Lucy Burwell Page Saunders' novel Dora Lee features a French-speaking macaw named Fanchon, based on Dolley Madison's parrot, who attacks three different characters in eight pages? Source: "Saunders undoubtedly used Polly as the model for Fanchon, a French-speaking macaw who attacks three characters within the span of eight pages."[3]) Gamaliel (talk) 15:34, 8 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I think "inspired by" would be clearer than "based on", and I also added "pet"; let me know if you disagree. I don't think there's any way to write a hook without the novel's name (believe me, I've tried), so I'm prepared to approve the hook below. (I confess I don't see the purpose of that "rule".) Once I have your sign-off, I'll complete the formalities. Extraordinary Writ (talk) 06:25, 9 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
ALT3: ... that Lucy Burwell Page Saunders' novel Dora Lee features a French-speaking macaw named Fanchon, inspired by Dolley Madison's pet parrot, who attacks three different characters in eight pages? Source: "Saunders undoubtedly used Polly as the model for Fanchon, a French-speaking macaw who attacks three characters within the span of eight pages."[4]):* Extraordinary Writ (talk) 06:25, 9 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

ALT3 looks fine. The novel doesn't need to be linked IMO. Yoninah (talk) 18:57, 9 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

ALT3 is now approved. Extraordinary Writ (talk) 23:55, 10 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry, I was AFK for a couple of days, looks fine to me. Thanks, everyone. Gamaliel (talk) 03:27, 11 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]