Talk:Homer's Barbershop Quartet/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Review from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs)

• "whose story roughly parallels" What kind of story? His life story?
• "and The Dapper Dans as the singing voices of The Be Sharps." Needs a verb, maybe "and The Dapper Dans provide the singing voices of The Be Sharps."
• "The episode begins with the Simpson family attending a swap meet." noun + -ing sentence structure is awkward, and "swap meet" needs to be disambiguated.
• "Homer then explains to "
• "recorded a barbershop quartet album" Already linked in the paragraph above.
• "He tells his family the story of how the band formed" I think "narrates (to)" would be a stronger berb here.
• "number one hit"-->number-one hit
• "It was praised for its The Beatles cameo, despite being a leftover episode from the previous season." Why would being a leftover episode detract from its praise?
• "Reviews that criticized the episode's comedy blamed the change of writers prior to the episode's creation for the inconsistent humor."-->Reviews that criticized the episode's inconsistent humor blamed it on the change of writers before the episode's creation.
• "Back in the present"
• "they were featured on merchandise " Comma after this phrase.

OK, that is the lead and Plot. Dabomb87 (talk) 20:19, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

Done. The despite being a leftover episode is from the Reception section, specifically The Washington Post. Gary King (talk) 20:51, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

• "in the final aired version of the episode." Maybe this is me not understanding TV-speak but what is a "final aired version"? Were there multiple airings and each were different?
• "When the episode went into production"-->When the episode's production began...
• "show runners of the episode"-->episode's show runners
• "that he rarely received questions about."-->that he was rarely questioned on.
• "David Crosby also makes a guest appearance in the episode as himself.[8]" What role does he play in the episode?
• "on which we see Homer turned " No first-person language please.
• "bring them all together"
• Ref 12 ""Nielsen Ratings /Sept. 27–Oct. 3"" Is the slash a typo? Dabomb87 (talk) 21:21, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

All done Gary King (talk) 04:33, 5 February 2009 (UTC)

Sorry, I completely forgot about this review. Passing. Dabomb87 (talk) 22:25, 7 February 2009 (UTC)