Wikipedia:Peer review/The World of Strawberry Shortcake/archive1

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The World of Strawberry Shortcake[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I began this page on an animated TV special almost four years ago, and now I've saved it enough to avoid a tentative merger into Strawberry Shortcake (80s Annual Specials). A long-awaited Triple Crown and a GAC are close by.

I'm planning to do the same for the remaining specials in the coming weeks or months, perhaps enough to merit a good topic on the subject.

Thanks, Slgrandson (How's my egg-throwing coleslaw?) 19:58, 7 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Almost forgot: I submitted this page as a Did you know? suggestion yesterday. --Slgrandson (How's my egg-throwing coleslaw?) 20:06, 7 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Review by ResMar Bleh, Strawberry Shortcake. Still, in the context of a complete encyclopedia...not much to say really, a nice short article that's ready for a nice short GA nomination.

General
  • Please see WP:DASH for instructions regarding the use of short (-) and long (—) dashes. Using clause-clause is simply not correct. I've fixed this using {{ndash}}.
Lead
  • The special received generally favorable reviews in the School Library Journal, which reviewed it twice in different decades. Clarify please: what decades?
Plot
  • Strawberry's foe, the Peculiar Purple Pieman... Is foe the right word? It's a kid's show after all :)
Release
  • Some time after the title character's debut at the 1980 American International Toy Fair, The World of Strawberry Shortcake was offered to the major U.S. television networks. What networks?
  • The source I have on hand doesn't say which ones, but I'm implying ABC/CBS/NBC (the only ones back then). For now, I've reworded it thus: "...major television networks in the U.S. were given a chance to air..." --Slgrandson (How's my egg-throwing coleslaw?) 16:31, 10 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I the {{mdash}}; you've picked up on it :) ResMar 18:57, 10 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]