Wikipedia:Peer review/St Anne's Pier/archive1
St Anne's Pier[edit]
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'm planning to take it to WP:GAN at some point. Any comments/suggestions/criticism would be appreciated.
Thanks, BelovedFreak 22:20, 8 September 2011 (UTC)
- Comments from Jappalang
Lede
- "To begin with, the pier was intended ..."
- "To being with" is redundant.
- "Originally 914 feet (279 m) long, the subsequent demolition of the seaward end of the pier has left a structure 600 feet (180 m) long."
- This sentence does not seem quite right to me ("subsequent demolition of the seaward end of the pier" is "originally 914 feet long"?); suggest, "Originally 914 feet (279 m) long, the pier was reduced to 600 feet (180 m) after the demolition of its seaward end."
Background
- "St Anne's-on-the-Sea is a planned seaside resort on the Fylde coast, and at the mouth of the River Ribble, in Lancashire."
- "... on the Fylde coast, and at the mouth of the River Ribble ..." implies to me two locations. Removing "and" seems to me the correct way to go.
Damage and recent history
- "... turned into a Tyrolean-style beer garden."
- Any idea what is "Tyrolean-style"?
- "... was held on 7 June 1974, attended by Anne, Princess Royal."
- I think this is where an "and" is warranted; i.e. "was held on 7 June 1974 and attended by Anne, Princess Royal."
Overall, I think the language is clear and the article covers broadly what GA asks for. There could be more to be written since The Strad (Vol 47, 1936, p. 295) writes about the St. Anne's Pier Orchestra, noting that it was orchestrated by William Rees and that the attendance was 900. St Anne's Pier was also where the larva of Thalassomya frauenfeldi Schiner seemed to have been first found (but I think this might be more relevant to the midge article). However, all these are just additional detail that are not really required (in my opinion) for GA. Jappalang (talk) 02:24, 15 September 2011 (UTC)