Wikipedia:Peer review/Brunswick (Brittonkill) Central School District/archive1

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Brunswick (Brittonkill) Central School District[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because it recently received a B quality rating, since which I have added a good amount of information and references. It was informally reviewed by a member of WikiProject Schools in December. I would like to see what it would take to bring this up for a legitimate GA review. Full disclosure: I am the only major editor of this article.

Thanks, ωαdεstεr16«talkstalk» 01:02, 20 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: While it is clear a lot of work has gone into this article, I think it needs a lot of work to get up to GA standards. Here are some suggestions for improvement.

  • The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article. Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself, but the rural fringe is only in the lead, for example.
  • As it is, the lead is too short. My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way. Please see WP:LEAD
  • Avoid external links in the article - convert them to inline citations / refs.
  • Many refs do not really back up what they are used for - the 12 former schools are insufficiently referenced just by giving the latitude and longitude for the former buildings.
  • A lot of the refs are from the school district itself - any chance for more independent third party sources? See WP:RS
  • Article needs more references, my rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref
  • There are a lot of bullet point lists, most of which should be converted to prose paragraphs to improve flow of the article.
  • The alma mater is a copyright violation and should be removed from the article - see WP:COPYVIO
  • The level of detail is too much in places, I doubt the committees of the BOE are encyclopedic / notable. Also the symbols used there are unexplained.
  • A model article is useful for ideas and examples to follow - there are two featured articles on high schools Plano Senior High School and Stuyvesant High School, which may be useful models.

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 04:31, 27 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]