Template:Did you know nominations/Manfred Kirchheimer
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Allen3 talk 18:27, 9 July 2014 (UTC)
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Manfred Kirchheimer[edit]
... that Manfred Kirchheimer became a documentary filmmaker and professor after his family escaped Nazi Germany in 1936?
- Reviewed: Éric Dewailly
Created by I am One of Many (talk). Self nominated at 22:38, 30 June 2014 (UTC).
Interesting article on good sources, impressive list of his works. Hook: the "escaped Nazi Germany" part needs an inline right behind it, technically. I would prefer to have a bit on his specific work besides the "escaped" ;) --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:36, 2 July 2014 (UTC)
- I didn't much like the hook either, but I had trouble coming up with a good idea from the article. You have given me an idea, however. How about
- ALT1
... that documentary filmmaker Manfred Kirchheimer made a film about graffiti on New York City subway trains?
- I am One of Many (talk) 23:31, 2 July 2014 (UTC)
- Gerda Arendt, how do you like this hook? I am One of Many (talk) 17:27, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
- I like the idea, but think most readers will know graffiti and don't need the information that a filmmaker made a film ;) - Also, the word Nazi will probably get you 1000 extra clicks and should be kept. My try to say the same:
- ALT2:
... that Manfred Kirchheimer, whose family escaped Nazi Germany, made a documentary film about graffiti on New York subway trains? --Gerda Arendt (talk) 22:33, 4 July 2014 (UTC)- That is a great hook, and I love your reasoning! I am One of Many (talk) 00:39, 5 July 2014 (UTC)
- We still need the references about the escaping doubled to right after the sentence (I will do it now), and probably a different reviewer, but I see no problem.
I don't want to approve my own hook. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 07:37, 5 July 2014 (UTC)
- ALT3:
... that after escaping Nazi Germany Manfred Kirchheimer made a documentary film about graffiti on New York subway trains?
- ALT3:
- That is a great hook, and I love your reasoning! I am One of Many (talk) 00:39, 5 July 2014 (UTC)
- ALT1
EEng (talk) 23:01, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
- Would be effective, but it was his family, he was to little for initiative, --Gerda Arendt (talk) 23:11, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
- How about a tweak?
- ALT4: ... that after his family escaped Nazi Germany, Manfred Kirchheimer made a documentary film about graffiti on New York subway trains?
- I am One of Many (talk) 23:22, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
- Beautiful. EEng (talk) 03:52, 9 July 2014 (UTC)
--Gerda Arendt (talk) 23:31, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
- Would be effective, but it was his family, he was to little for initiative, --Gerda Arendt (talk) 23:11, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
