Talk:AC Propulsion eBox

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Advertisement?[edit]

It has been suggested that this article is written like an advertisement. In what way? This article outlines the history of the eBox and lists its specification in an objective manner. Any suggestions which would help improve the objectivity and encyclopedic nature of this article would be much appreciated, but I see no reason to include a header suggesting it is written like an advertisement. Fbagatelleblack (talk) 02:12, 2 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Don't remove the header until the issue had been adequately addressed. The first paragraph sounds to me like it's trying to include advertising elements; It doesn't sound like an encyclopedia entry. The first sentence doesn't sound right to begin with: One of the events at which company executives made announcements of their intention to do Scion xB conversions was an October 2003 event recorded in pictures and commentary on the Electrifying Times website. And abit down: ...(excluding the cost of the gasoline engine, that is depurated in the conversion),... Wait, do you mean "depreciation" or "minuses from the cost?" All this language sounds like it came from a press release.--293.xx.xxx.xx (talk) 09:39, 2 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Fair 'nuff. I'll leave the tag up for now. I do want to point out that my contributions to the article have been 1) the photo and 2)some formatting/reference edits. I'll take your comment "do you mean..." to refer to the universal "you." Let me see if I can fix it up a bit and get an admin to weigh in. Cheers, Fbagatelleblack (talk) 20:45, 2 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I fixed the first reference, added another, and tweaked the first sentence you did not like. I can do more work on it soon. Understand that I have no affiliation with AC Propulsion, other than respect for their products and a long-term acquaintance with some of the employees. Fbagatelleblack (talk) 21:03, 2 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Not saying your a corporate plant. The article still sounds like it's a press release. example: The availability of a suitable battery was said to be an important step in allowing for the announcement of the program. Suitability requirements included that the battery be widely available ("off the shelf"), in volume, without danger that supply would be cut off or be overly limited. Thousands of lithium-ion batteries, of the 18650 variant, were proposed as suitable for the rechargeable battery system. Who made it? Why was it chosen? How is it put into the car? The section is too vague in that respect.--293.xx.xxx.xx (talk) 07:34, 4 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Comment I agree that this does read like an add, please refer to the Wikipedia manual of style WP:STYLE for some guidance on how to fix it. RP459 (talk) 21:25, 2 October 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The 'Official Website' link went to a '404'. Repointed link at rootpage, renamed link to 'company website'. — Preceding unsigned comment added by JerryLaGrou (talk • contribs) 20:09, 17 September 2011 (UTC)[reply]

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